The Great Nothing

The desert extended for what seemed greater than infinity. Under the heat of the sun, my skin was burning but I was used to the feeling. Flames on a body that never knew better. Never knew colder. Never knew truce. And will only know the lifelong fever of the desert.

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Hope of a better future born from what was left of some memories the oldest ones of us remembered. Water, trees, animals… things I never even thought of in the dizziness of the temperatures slowing down our every day. Thinking about what once was, and what could be if we do leave the shadows of the Great Dunes, even in the privacy of my dreams and my mind, seemed like a deadly sin. What if there were nothing else for us out there ? What if there was ? What if I was fine with not knowing ? Thinking about the time I may have wasted in those withered lands gives me vertigo.

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And yet, here I am, observing the horizon fully knowing that nothing has moved since yesterday. Time passes in a great silence down here. I see our desert as an hourglass where the sand flows one meaningless grain at the time. Tik tik tik waiting for the boom. It’s never coming.

 

I want to move in a great din. As I come, I shall be gone. Breathless body embracing my ever-changing soul. Never afraid of uncertainty. I want to be greater than my longing for something new. Feeling like a human and not something made out of sand. Facing what’s next, heart determined. Facing the Sun, eyes wide opened.